Some things are better

There are days when exercise and busy-ness just doesn't do the trick.
Yesterday was one. I did my morning 3-miler. I completed a list of chores before my work afternoon began. Still, I couldn't quite keep the dark thoughts from coming.
And come they did. It started the night before, when for some reason, I couldn't turn off my brain at bedtime. Instead, I sat in the review stands for a parade of the worst moments of my life. The embarrassments. The betrayals. The stupid remarks that cost me friendships. The remorse.
I did my best to make the daytime hours better. (Even to the point of planning a dinner that starred gravy!) But it didn't make much difference.
Today is off to a better start. But clouds and cold weather aren't helping.
So it seems like a good idea to meditate for a bit on some good things.
The college loans, for instance.
I've been worrying for the year since the cutback about college loans that we put on forbearance. Forbearance means you get a limited time off from paying on the loan (either you pay nothing or just the interest. If you pay nothing, the interest accrues and your loan becomes larger.) Forbearance is not the same thing as deferment. Deferment is just for people who are laid off completely. Not part-timers.
Our forbearances were over last month. Yet our financial situation is still very strained. Would the banks insist on returning us to full payment? If so, would we have to default? I held my breath.
But the story has a happy ending. We were able to work out a new payment plan that--though we're still strapped--will at least start decreasing the capital.
And, as long as we're on the subject, the federal health care bill may make things better for our daughter, who goes to college in three years. Instead of letting banks siphon off loans, the government will begin making them directly. Direct loans and grants were what put me through college, and the debts were easy to pay off, even for an entry-level worker.
There's the most recent Labor Department report, which shows the country added 162,000 jobs. While there are still plenty of caveats about that, it is at least some encouragement that maybe the worst really is behind us.
Here's another good thing: We will be able to replace our daughter's stolen cell phone with no extra cost to us except the activation fee because we can transfer the upgrade credits from other, older phones. So no more whining.
And then, there's the fact that we're still above water. It's been a crazy year, with plenty of late-night tears and deep-in-the-pit-of-my-stomach fear. But we've been able to make it thus far, so maybe we can hold out a little bit longer.
As long as the car and appliances hold up and gas stays low and we don't slip on a banana peel...