It means I'm beginning to think I may never become an optimist.
Now two years into this project, I'm just this close to giving it all up. I've gained exactly zero new insights into optimism and positive attitudes since December, as my oncoming extended whine may illustrate.
Like everybody else, I usually start the new year with some good intentions. I don't like to think of them as resolutions. They're just some sticky notes on my mental refrigerator. "You're too angry too much. You need to spend time every day meditating. Just learn to let the bad things go. Get back in the habit of blogging. And exercising. And composing. Something's gotta change for the better this year."
Stuff like that.
So how's it gone so far, you may ask.
First thing: A huge fight with my daughter. I'm not kidding. It was only, like, Jan. 3 or 4. Angry? Yes. Have I meditated? Not even once. Composing? No. Blogging? You can see for yourself. In fact, exercising is the one horse I've been able to get back up on.
So in the spirit of politicians everywhere, I've decided not to change myself at all. Instead, I'll spin it. This year, instead of trying to change my thinking, I'll be concentrating on doing. Specifically doing something that will bring in some desperately needed coin.
I have two things to report so far:
1) I've been trying to learn to make cake pops to sell...somewhere, somehow. Cake pops--basically, chocolate covered cake on a stick--are the rage on at least one coast, I've read, but no one seems to be doing them here.
People who know me may scoff. I can cook, sure, but I've never been much of a one for fine presentation. So the painstaking decorative hand that cake pops demand may prove to be too much. But I vow to have mastered the art by Valentine's Day or die trying. Here's an early attempt.
I'm still learning how much to thin the chocolate melts and the best way to get the writing on the front, which I haven't yet tried.
2)Now that I think about it, I can't really say much about the second project. It's just bad luck. But it's definitely a really real project that would (theoretically) bring in really real cash. Some day. Maybe not as soon as the cake pops, though.
Sadly, blogging is not something that has brought about any extra money, so I'll be cutting back my time on that. See how neatly that fits in with my sloth of late? Talk about expert spin.
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